Florida Motels offer GREAT! service.

We went to Disneyworld with Emily, Sean, Soren, and Sebastian.  But first we spent two days in St. Petersburg.  They stayed at a 5 star hotel.  We stayed at a minus 2 star motel.  (the scary thing is that it was actually a chain!)

It's hard to describe.  On the one hand it sorta kinda appeared someone was fixing the place up, and it sorta kinda appeared as if someone had given up on it.  We first drove up to the "back" side (not really the back side, more like the side side.....or whatever), and saw a huge dumpster filled with old and very stained mattresses.  EWEEYYUUUU.

We drove around to the front to find the office locked.  At 4:30 p.m.  So we hung around for awhile, and finally a nice and energetic woman showed up.  There was trash all around, and old rolled-up carpets outside.  But, we thought, it's cheap!  And all we are going to do is sleep here.  And there's a Taco Bell and a McDonald's within walking distance....if you are brave enough to walk here.  And besides, we had made a reservation on one of those internet thingys.....and had already paid for it.  (plus, although there was a lot of trash around, there were several signs saying:  NO REFUNDS).

Oddly, there was a swimming pool which was very clean.  Not a leaf in it.  And for the three days and two nights we were there not a single person was in it.

Ok. The room.

We realize things are different now than when we were kids.  Or, even different than they were last December.

The room (which the nice woman said we would react to by saying "OMG!") was one where our reaction wasn't OMG, but was, instead, WTF?  The nice woman also asked us how much we had paid for the room.  Their computer wouldn't tell her.  So, the next morning I popped my head in to report the amount to the sullen young man who had replaced the nice woman.  He was totally interested. 

Here are some photos:

1.  The refrigerator.  It had last been defrosted when Johnson was President:



2.  You don't really need to assemble the channel changer before you use it do you?



3.  NO WIRE COAT HANGERS!!  (there were two of them)



 4.  The pictures above both beds were identical.  It had been decorated in the height of the ugly 1970s, and was frozen in time:




5.  But, who can complain?  A minus 2 star motel might not be clean, might not have a refrigerator that is clean, might have a dumpster full of stained mattresses right outside, might only have two wire coat hangers, but it does have this in the night-stand drawer:

We couldn't find a way to describe this on Yelp.  Ideas?

(OK.  next entry is about Disneyworld.  That was...um.....better).